I read recently a blog post (that of course I can't find today, but I'll link it when I do) where a lady wrote out a list of 20 important things that she does daily. She gave this list to her husband and asked him to re-write the list, numbered as he sees each item in order of importance. At the end of the day he came back and said that the things on the list didn't matter, what he wanted to come home to each day was a happy wife and kids. Not cranky from being over scheduled, not too busy to be together. Sweet man.
This got me to thinking. What is on our families list? I contemplated what I thought would be on Mauro's list. I guessed that his top 3 would be -
1. Gardening
2. Dinner
3. A hot body (for me)
So last night we talked about it. I asked him what would be the top 3 things on his list of my responsibilities that he saw as most important each day. His first response was, well, you can all guess. I clarified that I meant household, community, and parenting responsibilities. After a long talk, this is what we came up with.
1. Happiness. We decided that no matter what chores or other work needed to be done, our kids needed to know that we love them, that we provide a happy childhood for them, and that we are aware and open to their needs and wants. We agreed that time outdoors each day, time to play individually, and time with each parent was important and vital every single day. We discussed closing each day by talking about the kids for a while, what happened, what needed to happen, and what we needed to work on.
2. Dinner. We both feel the importance of a closing family meal. Where we can talk about our day, our fun, our dreams, and our sadness. We both love the warmth and comfort of a delicious, hearty, and healthy dinner. Mauro told me how much he enjoys coming home after a hard day at work to a good meal, prepared with love especially for him. You have no idea how happy this made me, and how much of a compliment this was. I love LOVE to cook, and knowing it is important to him on the receiving end makes it even more special.
3. Organization. I take the responsibility of organizing our family life to heart. The cleaning, budget, community involvement, parties, vacation, housework, calendar, playdates, education, etc. I was impressed that Mauro felt this was so important also. We think that the organization of our family keeps us all moving fluidly. It provides a stability of life and gives us purpose. Some days that organization goes out the window. Some days I have no time to do what my "to do" list for Thursday calls for. But overall, keeping my family clean, in line, and busy is a job that I love dearly!
Most of these things we do already and will continue to improve. And we realize that some days the list will change and be added upon. It was really nice to talk about this together, and to paint a clear picture of what we both see as important. This lead us to talks about Amali and her need for attention, Cinco and his chillness, and the things we love and appreciate about each other. If I can end each day with a smile on everyone's face, nourishment and satisfaction in their bellies, and the knowledge we are on the right path, then I have done my job! I love my family!
